Friday, June 21, 2013

Yankee Doodle, Keep It Up.

SSIF! (SoSadIt'sFriday).. why? Because that means my sad, sorry, hungover behind is on it's way back home and my little vaca is officially over. Since I'm being a party pooper, Megan is going to keep the party going by talking about the near death experience that was her bachelorette party. Megan started blogging back in March (like me!) at Yammering Yankee and she's automatically cool simply because of this:

I like her already. I'd also like to think she stuck a feather in her hat and called it macaroni.


Hey Everybody!

My name is Megan, I normally reside HERE at Yammering Yankee but today I am blogsitting for Senorita Cortney! I think we can all agree that she has one kick butt blog so I am super stoked to be here! Since Ms. Cortney is currently out par-taying on a boat, drinking a frosty beverage in a coozy, I figured I would share my last boating experience, also known as my Bachelorette party.  The night started innocently enough: dinner, dancing, and copious amounts of alcohol with friends at a bar by a popular lake up North. Right around the 10th beer and 5th j├Ąger bomb I started to umm unravel...My brain shut off and a deranged alcohol infused woman took over. It was also at this point during the night me and my two best friends decided to jump on a boat with strangers, always a good idea.

Photo from the beginning of the night..still no idea what happened to my head band lol

Oh ya and I was 40lbs heavier in 2010 lol

While on our boat ride I decided I could no longer keep from "breaking the seal" so in my completely logical state of mind, I decided to attempt to pee off the side of a moving boat. Of course I failed and fell into the water. Since it was pitch dark nobody saw me fall in and as the boat proceeded to drive away all I can remember thinking was, "holy shiz I am going to drown here because my arms and legs don't seem to be working"...duh alcohol. I of course started to flail around desperately trying to keep my head above water then thank god, my best friend noticed I was no longer aboard and they turned around to get me. They pulled up and told me to swim to the boat...ya not one of the strangers had to jump in after me. As soon as the stranger resurfaced he said very loudly STAND UP!!! You see folks, me, a former competitive swimmer, was drowning in 4 feet of water.

When we pulled back up to the bar I was done, over it...

All I wanted to do was eat McDs, cry, puke, scream, and go home to Steve (my soon to be husband). After I accomplished all of these things, except go home to Steve, I passed out for the night.

The rest of the night I do not remember, I had to be told what I did next. I guess my best friend heard a commotion during the middle of the night and came to check on me. What she found I will forever be mortified over. You see in my incoherent state I mistook her Rubbermaid tub containing her Wii and all of the games as a toilet...

Yes, I wee'd on a Wii....

Apparently she screamed at me that it was not a toilet and I screamed back uhh yes it is lol.

She recounted my late night shenanigans the next morning in front of her mom and all I wanted to do was run to the nearest hole and throw myself in it, to this day I still feel terrible. Thankfully the Wii was not damaged and the both of them just laughed at me.

If you take anything away from this post, remember never have a Bachelorette party next to water and always make the bride pass out in the bathroom.

All I can say is I am only getting married once because I don't think I would survive another Bachelorette party. I hope you guys enjoyed my post because I sure enjoyed being here. If you would like to read more about me and the awkward situations I get myself into please visit my blog. Until next time.


As you can see, Megan's what they call, "a good time." While I'm being all sad face on my way back to the reality that is my life, go pay Meg a visit and see what other ridiculous stories she can tell you. I'll be seeing you all on Monday!

 photo signature-9.jpg


Erin said...

hahahah wee'd on a wii!!!

Chloe said...

Yes! I love this Megan. I about died.

Cortney, sorry your vacay is over love. But we can't wait to hear about drunk shenanigans!

Adriana said...


also Megan is hilarious

Leila Joycey said...

hi new follower here :)
great blog
leila xx

Yammering Yankee said...

Thanks for all the love guys! And thanks again Cortney for having me!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...